Ah crap, the Snark has just found out that Dick Clark will be Rockin’ In The New Year again over at ABC. Dick Clark just turned 79 last month and according to the Huffington Post is currently using a walker and a wheelchair. No one wants to see that shit! New years is a time to be happy and celebrate with family and friends, not to be depressed listening to stroke recovering Clark fumble through his monologue and painfully watch Ryan Seacrest try and play off him. It’s so painful, like visiting my grandparents at an old folks home, the moment you get their you want to leave which is how I felt when watching this train wreck at a house party a few years ago. Well nowadays since I have two little kids at home, the wife and i will play it low key and stay in…and like a rubbernecker watching a car accident on the freeway, we’ll probably be drawn in to watching this train wreck happen.
Even this promo photo released by ABC two years ago is painful to look at….look how forced Ryan Seacrest is and poor dick talking out of the side of him mouth!
Dick, you shoudl be home with your wet nurse rockin’ the New year in your rocking chair. You deserve the time off and we deserve a break from the Pitty party. For more info click here or check the networks site here.
{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
You’re a bad man Chad, bad bad man.
LOL! I am just hoping to reserve my seat in hell before the year is over!
You don’t want to go to hell so soon. I heard they make you watch an endless video of Dick Clark crossing the road using his Walker.
LOL Ling, that would truly be HELL. Happy New Year!
Chad I how you don’t live to be an old man, you cculd end up like Dick someday.
hilarious post dude. thanks a lot.
Haha, good stuff Chad – reminds me of the scene in Futurama – New Years 4110 with Dick Clark’s Head in a Jar!
Excellent typing Kathy
Hey Miguel, thx dude. He actually looks better in 4110 than now. Oh many I saw him this year on the tube…AHHH! Was that awful or what?