T&A Do New Year’s 2012

One of our names begins with T and the other with A – we’re a magical combo representing the front and the back, the best of both worlds, the humps and the lumps. We’re women with similar life paths, who came to Los Angeles ages ago and earned our stripes looking for love among the Hollywood hipsters. We are here to share what we’ve learned with you, with the charm of Southern gals and the smarts of city vixens.

A has dated so many LA guys that she couldn’t come close to naming them all, and sometimes doesn’t recognize them in public.

T has managed not to kill her boyfriend, somehow.

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The recent popularity of “Shit Girls Say” has illuminated the fact that as much as we women are all unique and special unicorn creatures with individual talents and dreams … it’s also not hard to make amusing generalizations about the dumb stuff that comes out of our mouths (don’t get upset, you can play that game with anyone).

So in that spirit, and in the interest of being less easily-mockable in 2012, we’ve identified some less-than-flattering behaviors that a lot of us (at least the young fun-seeking variety) are habitually guilty of.

Crafted from our own and our friends’ experiences, we present to you–

T&A’s New Year’s Resolutions for LA Ladies!

We’re gonna try our best to follow them this year, and you should too (congratulations if they don’t apply). And please, never ever say to us “I had SUCH a good sleep.”

Have fun with your New Year’s Eve activities and don’t beat yourself up if you’re not in a lip lock with someone at midnight. You could be avoiding someone with secret lip herps.

Here we go:

Don’t wear shoes you can’t walk in gracefully.

Don’t wait in long lines for nightclubs, cupcakes, or Target clothes.

Start or finish that project you talked about last year.

Don’t pick up the phone or answer unsolicited texts after midnight.

Go home when your friends are ready to leave — don’t count on finding a ride (i.e., having a regrettable hookup).

Keep your phone charged and a spare charger in your purse.

Get enough sleep and enough calcium.

Talk more with your friends about topics other than the guys you’re dating.

Don’t say anything about your friends you couldn’t say to them in person.

If you decide not to talk to one of your friends anymore, make sure she understands why.

Be kind to other women.

Plan your own future — not just “ours.”

Don’t count on sex or sexiness to get you everything you want.

Don’t say “no” because you’re scared.

Don’t pursue someone who isn’t showing reciprocal interest.

Don’t be a coward about ending a relationship — do it with tact and respect.

Explore the city outside your own scene.

Remember who you were before you got here.